The irony of it being NYD. . .

So I'm not usually one to be all "This year is going to be the best year yet!" on New Years Day.  It gets annoying that everybody does it and I honestly don't know if it's going to be the best year.  I'm going into it with a few odds stacked against me.  But, sitting on my couch in my pajamas, I look at the year ahead of me and know that, even if it's not "the best year ever in the entire universe ", I am going to make it through it.  I am going to have good times and bad times.  Things are gonna happen that knock me flat on my face.  And there are gonna be people that come and help me as well as some that come and kick me while I'm down.  But that's life.  That's how it always rolls.  And, as I look at that realization in the face, I realized that I'm okay with that.  Because this year is going to be another year of progress.  It's going to be a year of everything.  Just like last year.  And the year before that.  And that's just how it is.  How it always has been.  How it always will be.

I'm not going to make a bunch of goals that I'm not going to meet because making a goal that lasts a whole year that is almost impossible to measure seems stupid.  Plus, it just makes you feel like a failure when you don't reach that goal.  I'm not going to sit here and say that I'm going to work out more or eat healthier or do more service work or better budget my money.  I hope that I can get better at those things this year but I'm not going to make this hugely unrealistic goal in relation to those things.  I'm going to take every day as it comes, I'm going to laugh when I should and cry when I need to.  I'm going to be the best person I can be.  And I'm going to be a friend to those that are in need of one.  I'm going to let go of people that don't want to be in my life and I'm going to hold tight to the ones that do.  I'm going to be a positive person.  I'm going to look at the bright side as much as possible but I'm not going to beat myself up when I do get into a low emotional state.

This is my goal.  This is me.

In the best mood I've been in in an incredibly long time and feeling incredibly optimistic,

-Rachel